The 10 people you see at Zumba

Zumba one day post-flu and 2 hours post-coconut chicken with sweet chili sauce is not the best idea I ever had. Totally just going through the motions. Not trying. This gave me a lot of time to think...and since I've been an avid Zumba-goer for the last 3 years (mostly stalking the great Cecilia Mills where she teaches [I've never felt so incredibly sexy and grossly out of shape at the same time] and am able to pick up choreo fairly easily (thanks to Kelly Christie and endless hours of dance rehearsals), sometimes I just turn on my inner "auto-dance" and scan around the room. 

And tonight it hit me.

There are very different types of people who go to Zumba. As I was halfheartedly shakin' my grove thang, I saw it oh so very clearly.

Ahem. Allow me to explain the ten types of people you will see at any given Zumba class:

1. The Motivators: These people will take it upon themselves to motivate everyone who looks even slightly winded. They will dance around everyone and even at times in front of someone to try to boost the energy in the room. I get what you're doing, but holy crap you're annoying.

2. The Latinas: You're totally legit. Not only do you understand the lyrics to the song, but you manage to make every form of Latin dance completely effortless. You have my respect. 

3. The "Other" Latinas: You look Latino. You don't dance Latino. 
4. The Fellas: guys at a Zumba class fall into either one of two sub-categories: funny, outgoing OR extremely nerdy, awkward and uncoordinated. There is no gray area. 

5. The Resolutioners: The larger crowd who make it their New Year's Resolution to just "lose that last 50 pounds!" every year. These people are the reasons gyms make so much money. Bless your heart. There's always next year.

6. The Skinnies: Shut up. Go eat a taco.

7. The 80's Jazzerciser mom: No matter what you do. How hard you try. Every move you do will always look like something straight out of the 80's. (Although those white high socks and scrunchie in your hair aren't exactly helping either). 

8. The White Girls: We try. It's a 50/50 chance of looking cool. 

9. The Out of Body-ers: These people have no concept of their body movement or the personal space of others. These are the people who will often bump into you while flailing their arms and throwing their hips around. And somehow they really think they're doing the same moves as the instructor? Really?.....Really?

10. The Sororities: The girls who come with like 10 of their girlfriends, giggle a lot, and also like to randomly grind on each other at some point during class.

Which category describes me? Total white girl. 

Love Zumba.

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