Thoughts 11 days in..

Ahhh.."me" time. Finally. This baby thing is EXHAUSTING. Tonight my mom and sister went out to give us some "family time" alone. Well, here's what's happened during "family time"...James fed Jillian from a bottle and she promptly vomited (again) all over herself. So I finished feeding her, put her in PJ's, and changed her massive poopy. ...That's now a regular word in my vocabulary.
While I was changing her, she spit up all over her PJ's. Great...which end do I tend to first? So we changed her again, got her all snuggled and I sang to her until she fell asleep. As soon as I laid her in her bassinet, I heard what can only be described as an old tractor trying to be started.
More "poopy".
Changed. Singing. Asleep. And she lasted about 10 minutes before she started crying again. James picked her up and within 30 seconds she was out. Spoiled? Probably. I should probably read a parenting book. When would I do that?
Things like this make me miss "me" time.

Anyway. I think partial thoughts these days. Most of my conversations are in fragments (and mostly about diapers, spit-up, and me asking my mom, "Is that normal?".

Some of my other thought fragments now that we're 11 days into this parent thing:
  • I haven't gotten a breath of fresh air in 3 days. I also don't think I've put deodorant on in those three days. Gross.
  • Oh boobs. Pain. I can totally understand why some women just opt straight for the bottle.
  • How many poopy diapers has she had today? Okay good.
  • Oh. I've started doing that thing. Where I talk for her to James and call him "Daddy".
  • Soggy cereal again. Cold foods are hot, and hot foods are cold by the time I get done feeding her and onto feeding myself. James and I eat in shifts.
  • Thank you heavens above for letting me have a baby that sleeps 4 hrs at a time at night.
  • Crap! I haven't checked her diaper in a few hours. I feel like the worst mom ever.
  • Have I gotten off the couch today?
  • Boobs. PAIN.
  • Oooo cute outfit! I have to get it (for her..not me). Does she have a bow already to match?
  • Am I really expected to do all of this alone when my family goes back home? AH!
  • She makes ALL her facial expressions while she's eating. Hilarious. I'd record it if it wasn't well, when she was eating.
Anyway. I'm trying to stay SANE during all of this. I figure if I can make it through the first month then I should get it figured out enough to make it.
Earlier during "family time," we were sitting on the couch watching some random TV show. I wasn't really watching, just kind of staring at it. I turned to James and said, "This is probably going to be like every night for us now, huh?"
"Yup." He replied.
This makes me want to cry.

But then I realize how cute she is, and that makes me want to cry too. But for different reasons.


  1. all that poop means you're doing something right. i used to bounce maggie in the middle of the night and literally pray for poop. i almost always got it. :)

    they'll spit A LOT up until like 3 or 4 months. if you think it's over the top or if she seems like it hurts, ask the ped. also, check the flow on your nipple on the bottle. maggie puked up majorly until we found the right bottle. i highly recommend breastflow. they are awesome and they teach babies how to latch even better. (and they mimic the rate at which your milk comes down.)

    showering...if you can figure that out in the first month, you were way ahead of me. i'm still working on it.

    you'll figure it and her out. i think it did take me about a month to figure out what her language was. after that, i still doubted myself a lot but i at least knew what she wanted.

    (don't read books. they're crap. you know your baby. ask other moms. they've been through it. if you're really worried, ask your ped. but don't read anything about sleep or sleep training or schedules or anything. when they're this little, you CANNOT spoil them. the best thing we ever watched was "the happiest baby on the block" because basically? they're still fetuses...just outside the womb. but you know what? do what you feel is right--if books feel right to you, do it. you're the parents, uniquely prepared to be HER mom and dad. the books just made me feel like a crap mom...if i can save someone from hat, i'll try. although penelope leach is awesome!)

    you're doing fantastically.

  2. Hello Whitney - I'm sure you didn't intend for people to just leave a bunch of comments of advice.... but since I'm here.... :) Way back when - when I was a stay at home mom and at one point had two babies under three and watched Barney until it gave me post traumatic stress disorder -I realized it was best to set very small goals for myself. Like today I will brush my teeth and wear something other than what I slept in. Also I would change the furniture around alot which gave a different perspective of the tv from where ever you would sit. You are awesome and I have no doubt doing an awesome job. Being a mom is hard work! <3 xxoo from L.B.

  3. Haha- thanks for the advice and words of encouragement- it's greatly needed!! :-)


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